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out of touch, out of time

there's this self-indulgent game that we play of feigning and ignorance. the word ignorance shall then be taken to mean the refusal to acknowledge rather than the lack of awareness. ignoring would therefore be a better word. and in this game one aims to elicit some form of attention or affection from the other player in the game, through a series of avoidances. cheating is allowed in this game and the player can therefore make use of his preconceived suspicions and more importantly, frustrations, to justify his actions - in this case, the lack of any decent form of proper conversation over an extended period of time, thus reflecting a somewhat blase attitude in the other player. based on this, the first player will then determine the best course of action to deal to the second player mainly to vent his pent up emotions, but scratching beneath the surface, his real intention might simply be to construct the distance to sustain his great enlightenment obtained from a foreign land. bottom line is, he wants to be heard, and for the second player to know that 'you can pretend everything's as before and go through the routine of dispensing courtesies when required, but all i really want is to know why haven't we talked properly? why do i not see you online at all? why do you not text or call to ask if we want to meet for lunch and catch up on what we've done over the break? so don't expect me to reply to some random cheeky message in a lecture after maintaining all that silence for a week since we've both got back. in all honesty, i am not regressing back to the way i was before the break. i'm just angry at you for not being the friend you promised to be.'

there are no winners or losers in this game. the end's hard to determine because most people give it up after a while. no one really knows where the game, or themselves, are headed towards to.

“out of touch, out of time”