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one week gone by. it's a week after mayhem. i've put it behind me, knowing that people who matter actually do care, and that it has made me wanna be a better friend, with alot of self control.

daniel woke me up, sort of. that day over dinner in camp, we were talking and he made me see that there were people who thought better of me, that there were expectations of me to be met. i've moved on from moping in self regret and disappointment, to wanting to better myself, and to really appreciate my friends for who they are to me. daniel, thank you. we've had so many talks at the mess and you are one man i deeply respect.

and that night, we were talking about the army, and how it has made a difference in our lives. people don't realise it, but these two years change people and, recognising the fact that you've changed and grown up bears testament to the fact itself. experiences mould a person and the people you meet can never be taken away. it doesn't matter if you become an officer, spec or man. medic, driver or storeman. at the end of the day, we're all people seeking a way through these two years at least. friends go beyond these superficial levels. lines should not demarcate us for the ranks and appointments we hold. people do judge you for the rank you hold and that i do agree with daniel. but like i said, rank makes the organisation what it is, and the people make up its heart. it's impossible to do away with stereotypes, but it takes every individual to want to transcend these typecasts and work with your heart more than the neccessity to fit in. respect should be given to everyone irregardless of rank and that's what the army needs to learn - tact. so to those who are disillusioned with the army thus far, take heart knowing that people do care, and that the army has a long way to go before reaching its ideal state. take these two years to learn more of yourself. learn to see yourself for who you are. and most importantly, learn to appreciate the friends who will take you through these times.

ok. i sound like an army poster. so this week was crazy. sweep sweep sweep. cft. and super huge disposal. army stuff that can only be understood by fellow like minded kindred. haha. can't elaborate further so we'll just leave it as that. played mahjong with chew andre and james the whole night. won peanuts but whatever. gonna meet jun ren for lunch and spidey later! he just came back from thailand and he has bailey's for me!

and i had first contact with the x after months.

more bullshit to bear. more disappointment. more silent injustice. stifled silence.